Fatally wounded PM Keir Starmer tried to phone a friend…but discovered he doesn’t have any.
Starmer under pressure amid reports he could quit next week
The calamitous PM – limping from crisis to crisis with knives in his back – still thought he could limp on as pressure mounted.
He pompously believed he was 50/50 before Judas Iscariot Andy Burnham won Makerfield and his Cabinet colleagues have put him straight: he’s run out of road and his time is up.
“Instead of rallying around several Cabinet ministers are understood to have urged him to set out a timetable for his departure.
“More Cabinet ministers than not told him that he needs to set out a timetable.”

PM Keir Starmer (Image: Getty)

PM Keir Starmer is oblivious to the mess he’s in (Image: Getty)
‘Is that your final answer?’ stuttering Starmer might well have asked them.
He might have expected them to say “take your time” but one by one, like nodding dogs, those who he once counted as trusted confidantes, including Transport Secretary Heidi Alexander and Foreign Secretary Yvette Cooper, are thought to have told him to walk away.
The source added: “As a result of the list of names and the wobbly ring round, Keir will realise the game is up and the next few days will be about shoring up his legacy.”
Ha! Some legacy he leaves – a net favourability rating of -42 and an economy that consistently ranks as among the weakest for growth and living standards in the G7 group of wealthy nations.
It might come as little surprise that among his vanishingly small number of supporters is Chancellor Rachel Reeves. Well, with friends like those.
Another loyalist said: “I think if Keir held firm there is a fair chance Andy would implode and at best would arrive at the finish line much damaged.”
They say a week is a long time in politics.
But the herd is now moving and the following few days will see the PM turfed out of office – proving actually that the weak are a long time in politics.
Burnham is due in Westminster tomorrow where he will be feted as leader in waiting (despite having twice stood for the Labour leadership previously and twice been comprehensively rejected).
As recently as Friday defiant Downing Street insisted the PM would stay on and fight any leadership challenge.
It appeared that Starmer, Burnham, Wes Streeting, and perhaps Ed Miliband, would go head-to-head in the battle for the poisoned chalice.
“Computer, please take away two of the wrong answers…”
It now looks increasingly likely Burnham will face off against net zero zealot Miliband.
And if that is the case, then God help us all.





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